i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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