just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
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