I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Randomize
