you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Randomize
