too bad you live with your parents still
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
