Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Randomize
