the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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