thus making me awesome and them whores
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
