I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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