seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
