I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
