The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
you guys were way drunker than both of me
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
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