I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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