White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
operation harelip BJ is a go
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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