i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
