Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize