Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Randomize
