I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Randomize
