I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Randomize
