i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
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