Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
How drunk are you?
Completed.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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