He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize