You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize