Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
