apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Randomize
