ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize