i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
