everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
