what if every blade of grass was a penis?
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Randomize
