Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
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