By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Randomize
