dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Randomize
