Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
