Screwed.edu
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
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