i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Randomize
