I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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