I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
