His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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