I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Its about making memories worth repressing
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
i need some magic done to my vagina
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Randomize
