ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
