Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
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