I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
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