Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
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I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
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I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
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