Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
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We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
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too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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