Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
