just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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