My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
