He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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