Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
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