im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
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