What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
